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Westford Academy, Westford, MA, February 2010, Live is The Sister I Never Had

Liv is the sister I never had, and the best friend I will never forget. No one else in my life can even compare to what this girl did for me, or even for you. I always think about how different of a person I would be if Liv never came in to my life, and I regret I never told her how I felt. She showed me how to not be afraid, how to love others, how to be aware of the good things in life, how to be myself, and how important a friend is. Liv was never scared of anything, I swear she was a 250 pound old man stuck in a 110 pound 17 year old girl’s body. I can tell you that I am able to stand here now only because she’s here, I would never be able to do this on my own. I can stand in front of my entire grade and smile because of her. I can make it through the three classes I have with her, looking at her empty desk, because she’s here. Her strength now seems to over power me and takes control. She won’t let me just run away to a place furthest away from here as possible like I want to. She makes me strong for you.

Liv has love deep inside of her that is incredible. She never just looks at someone and judges them, she tries to get under their skin and find out who they really are. We both agree that you need to approach people all the same no matter what because in the end everyone is human. She simply loved making connections with people, even if they seemed to be the complete opposite of her. All you have to do is watch her when she walks into a room filled with people. I can guarantee you that 99% of people in that room will remember Liv’s name. She showed me that there is no such thing as too much love, and she wants you to remember that.

Liv is always the one to think positive. I’ll get in the car complaining about how I just failed yet another algebra test, got my phone, computer, and car taken away and she’ll just turn to me and smile and say something like hey well just think in 8 months you will be living on your own so really it doesn’t even matter! All I can do is laugh back because it doesn’t help my situation at all and the fact that I have to wait 8 more months just seems to be a sick joke. She laughs with me and just turns the music up while trying to convince me to tell my mom that we are just doing homework so we can go fishing for a little bit. She tried to make everything positive and was the most optimistic person I knew. Next time you think that everything is going badly, just think, only 8 more months and it won’t matter!

Being myself. Now this is something I can say I do now, but before I met Liv I was whatever everyone wanted me to be. She might have only been 17 but that girl knew who she was and had zero doubt in herself. Real is the only way to describe her. She never did something that she didn’t want to do, and always did what she wanted. She wasn’t scared of the vulnerability of being an individual. She walked around in her hippie boots, with her curly hair, two hemp necklaces on, and some insane dress that just fit her personality perfectly, and loved it. She embraced the individual and the idea of self invention, she knew that if you did this you would be the happiest you could possibly be.

As I stand here all I can think about is that I was lucky enough to call Liv my best friend. If I ever went places without her it was inevitable everyone would ask me, “hey! where’s Liv?” I can’t even tell you how much I am going to miss hearing those words. She was the one person I talked to every day, we always knew what each other were doing. I connected with her so unbelievably well I still don’t understand why we weren’t friends earlier. We always said we were the same person, and some people even jokingly call us twins. I know that it’s going to be the hardest thing of my life to live without her, but it’s almost like she prepared me for it. She taught me more than I ever needed and I know she wants me to keep going. She is watching me and you waiting for this to be over so we can all get together and do exactly what she wants. Liv’s death is still unreal to me and I can honestly say I don’t know if I will ever fully grasp it, but I can feel her around me. She was one with nature, and on the night she died I was laying on my living room floor after all my friends left just thinking of all the things we are going to miss together and I looked out my window and saw this one shining star. I felt her then. It was like she felt the emptiness inside me and filled it with her love. I know she will do the same for you. Don’t focus on what you are going to miss with her, don’t regret the times you missed, remember the times you had and how she taught you what she taught me. Remember she lived her life to the fullest every day, and wants you to continue living that way. Live it up. Liv’s life brought us together, but her death brought us closer.

St. Catherine’s Church, Westford, MA, February 2010

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